Jamon's original Barni article still makes me laugh till I cry

The A-Z list of Tips for success:
Ask fellow fisherman where the fish are biting
Belch loudly to announce you finished another beer
Cuss as often as you can, especially after farming a fish
Dragging the outdrive on the launching dock
Dropping something in the water- preferably expensive or valuable
Explain the secrets of Powerbait fishing
Fall into the water or fall over in your lawn chair (preferably while sleeping)
Give tips to people who are outfishing you
Holler at passing women, good looking or not
Insist on keeping everything you catch
Jump on a fishes head to make it reach the legal size limit
Keep a mental record of how well you are doing compared to your fishing partner
Loud laughing or talking between friends
Mention how many fish you caught yesterday
Never fish with under 20lb test
Openly piss into the lake/stream instead of a bush or bathroom
Put 5 or 6 heavy split shot in front of your lure to get it down there
Quit fishing when you run out of beer
Reel with your spinning reel upside down
Spill beer on oneself whenever possible
Talk about the last episode of "Fishing with Orlando Wilson"
Underwear should be partially, if not fully, visible
Venture over to the spot where someone just caught a fish and fish there.
When getting schooled explain that you don't mess around with smaller fish
Yell at the wife or kids (the wife to run to the store and get more beer, the kids to shut up)
Zero in on what color Powerbait is catching the big ones